My Mental Health

Through my entire life thus far, I was chasing this idea of happiness. As I navigated along the many peaks and valleys of this past decade, I found moments of happiness that I thought were finally going to be when...when I'd find true happiness and that emotion would carry me on towards all my other goals. But when life got a little rough at times; whether that be through ways of family, work or personal growth - I'd feel guilty for feeling any other emotion that resounded in my spirits other then happiness. That guilt would push me further into that ephemeral pursuit, causing more internal dissonance.

However, I believe that I've finally reached a cognitive place of understanding about myself and my paradigm. It wasn't about just "being happy" and prolonging that state of mind at all times - that's actually the definition of being manic. Finding happiness for me actually meant finding purpose and meaning through my daily actions and future goals; through living more intentionally - with purpose and a higher degree of critical thinking -  I've developed a sense of confidence in myself that I didn't have before. This new confidence has given me a stronger foundation to lean onto whenever life gets a little bumpy. Practicing gratitude has also been life changing for my mindset as well. Because life is not perfect, it is easy to get bogged down by people's negative energy; and perpetuating that energy into parts of your own life, allowing it to bring down your vibe. But by aligning my actions with my goals, doing the best I can with the resources I've been blessed with and having faith in myself and empathy for others, I feel like the qualm in  my mind is finally settling. Every morning as I'm waking up and night as I'm tucking myself into bed, I release a soft whisper into the universe, "Thank you."

During my decade of self discovery, my husband always was a pillar of support - even through all the rough times. He created a safe place for me to discover my inner passions because he wanted to see me happy. I spent a lot of time thinking...radically ambitious about possibilities, futures and relationships that I knew were the foundations for personal growth and life contentment. I'm excited about what the next chapter of our lives...there is so much to look forward to.

"Be strong enough to to let go, and wise enough to wait for what you deserve." 

Thanks for reading.